okay. the first week of my university life has passed. so..how was it??hmm. i can say its a fresh start indeed. for the first time, going to some place with no familiar faces, no friends at the first day whatsoever. indeed, finally a chance to set up a whole new image, giving first impressions, coping culture shock..a whole new start. a perfect place to train up my 'red ness' indeed..
so how i was doing?hmmm..not that well..not that i suck or something..just this stuff can't really be rushed you know..first of all, the week starts with lectures. as in real lectures held in a big auditorium, with lights dim, and slide shows and all. ya, lecture halls ain't the best place to interact. you just sit there and listen, say hi to your neighbour beside you, after lectures, off you go to respective destinations. plus, i don't really like to sit at the front in the lecture hall, which means i actually sit among the guys, and not the girls, who sits right at the front taking down notes. oops.
next, there's this weird timetable, each people set their own timetable, chooses their own subjects. and so most probably you'll be in different classes all together for each tutorial and laboratory classes with each other..tutorial is a better place to make friends, and most of them starts in the second week. hmm..seems that i'm doing not too bad in the first week, the second week should probably be better??
so, i had make the effort to make friends okay..haha..i've actually met quite many people and talked to them. too bad all the faces are different in every class, so i haven't actually really KNOW someone..i actually even get to know people from India, Kenya, Bangladesh, Indonesia and of course people from other states. its like wow. monash is INDEED an international university..
yep. so i still don't have lunch mate, not knowing the people close enough, especially GIRLS. and the guys all look like soloist too.. oh well..i believe things would be better in the second week. having more tutorial classes and all..then i can start joining clubs and societies??hmmm..nice indeed..
so. monash huh..i never dreamt i'll actually be studying here..its like a high class university..the services is first class, the security guards are friendly and helpful..i saw there's rock climbing, snookering , Foosball facilities in the university.. WOW. compare to *cough* inti *cough*..its really different..the lecturers are nice, and i trust their teaching is good too. and their online system is wonderful!! web drive and website system those..i can access everything on my iPad!!haha..and i mean EVERYTHING. lecture notes, practices, past year assessments, announcements.. everything is so organized and ready-made..my iPad is sooooooooo useful =D
oh ya, and the library??its AWESOME.. there's more computers than enough, each also already contain all the files of all the lectures..and on the 3rd floor, there's actually a seperated room with cosy, colourful bean bags, sofas, cushions and small desks..sooo fitted for a slow study or short rest or just to hang out..so, my dad paid for me to study here. hrm. so expensive. and so i MUST study well, learn well, behave well. or i think i'll kena lightning or god'll take away all the awesome stuffs i have..like my car and iPad. hrm. choi! so, i promise to be good!!
okay. the classes. its interesting..for the first week its mostly repeating of form 5 and a level stuff, though they go through it quite fast..aiks. and i wasn't really paying attention. i believe i'll need absolute attention in future lessons, as the lectures progress quite fast. oops.. eventually i'll also need skills to jot down the lectures..hmm.. so the only interesting part of my curremt assignment now is to build a hospital!! haha.. its a project in Engineering Professions. where we're randomly spilt into groups of 5, then its like we're hired by some real life medical group, to build a actual private hospital in Bandar Puchong. cool huh?? and the main thing is to come out with a design where its energy efficient and maximises usage of reusable energy..we have to consider the cost, feasibility, energy, design, facilities, location, technology, comfort, services and other aspects we're to put in the hospital. haha. i'm in charge of the design..so i'm trying to find any materials concerning going green buildings.
hmm..uni life indeed. this is going to be a awesome four years =D
chaoz~
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
BLUE and RED
haha.i think this the the best post title i had, ever. hrm..anyway, i just got counselled today, by the person who called me in my previous post. haha. first, thanks him a lot!!i got a much much clearer picture of the exits where the path i chose leads to.
so, engineering. apparently, i'm suitable for it after all! phew, a great relieve. the designing of circuit or system, researching, testing, improvising. isn't that my hobby or not?haha. but apparently, although i will like it, people will get sick of it eventually after few years doing the same thing stuck in the office. some choose to leave and go into sales instead, and start a small business of selling chemicals, for instance. and you who is left behind would start to think about leaving soon too, when all the people around you went away and get a better pay outside the office. hrm. the other route is go into management, climb the corporate ladder. BUT, i need to be prepared for the social skill thingy, facade, communicating, facade, network building and stuff, and be PRO at it. aiks. sound so tough for me as a BLUE person.
hmm. or, quit the engineering world, all the adventures and possibilities, and settle down educating the younger generations instead, as a lecturer. or, continue with studying and researching until i achieve the great position as a PE?? or, quit the job thing once and for all, and stay at home as a full time housewife.lol. this is so NOT an option.
hmm..so which do i want?perfect career life or great family supporter? apparently, i need to decide now so i can focus on polishing the skills i need in these last four years of education before i step into total chaos of the outside world. its now or never.
i tell you what i want. i want BALANCE. hrm. and this is actually a tough position to be into. and why is that?because i'm OKAY with anything. i can be stuck in a office forever designing great stuff. i can start a business if i have a partner and be organised with it. i can be lecturer and be happy with youngsters. i can do part time job and live more for my future family. lol. and if i'm just okay with everything, i would not excel in anything. i would not focus and give my best to whatever i'm doing. and again, stuck in the centre, weird, middle range. this is what the 'BALANCE' i want would turn out.
see??see how bad it would be??so i have to push myself from now. bear in mind what would turn out if i don't give my best. and really really FOCUS in what i HAVE to do now. ya. my red colour. improve my red colour!!!my blue is more than enough, maybe i even won't need to work that hard to graduate as an engineer. but my RED. only freaking four years left to work with it. its do or die. i DON'T want to be a nerdy engineer who is stuck in her post and friendless forever. ( choi! btw.) apparently my 'redness' is BELOW the passing rate. aiks. i so don't want this. i wasn't like this. its the freaking bloody nerdy stupid a levels which made me turn out like this in these past two years. i was a leader. i was brave. i was active. i was SOCIAL. long ago. it should be still in me. i just need to awaken it once again. the passion to bond with people, to care, to love and to believe.
RED RED!!GO RED!!
i'm on the highway already. the 'ENGINEERING' highway. i still don't know which exit i would take that i'll be on for the rest of my life. but i know to get til the end, 'RED' is my essential catalyst. it'll craft my way and lead me to a life i can cope with, no matter what the obstacles are. i've known this for a long time already, but only in my brain. today, i've listen to exact words of my greatest failure thrown at my face by other people. its time for the problem to be faced and to be solved. its time to shape myself to a better, stronger, braver, greater person. IN THESE FOUR YEARS.
hmph. i can do it. i must do it. i must change. i must not eat my own words.
chaoz for now. til then.
so, engineering. apparently, i'm suitable for it after all! phew, a great relieve. the designing of circuit or system, researching, testing, improvising. isn't that my hobby or not?haha. but apparently, although i will like it, people will get sick of it eventually after few years doing the same thing stuck in the office. some choose to leave and go into sales instead, and start a small business of selling chemicals, for instance. and you who is left behind would start to think about leaving soon too, when all the people around you went away and get a better pay outside the office. hrm. the other route is go into management, climb the corporate ladder. BUT, i need to be prepared for the social skill thingy, facade, communicating, facade, network building and stuff, and be PRO at it. aiks. sound so tough for me as a BLUE person.
hmm. or, quit the engineering world, all the adventures and possibilities, and settle down educating the younger generations instead, as a lecturer. or, continue with studying and researching until i achieve the great position as a PE?? or, quit the job thing once and for all, and stay at home as a full time housewife.lol. this is so NOT an option.
hmm..so which do i want?perfect career life or great family supporter? apparently, i need to decide now so i can focus on polishing the skills i need in these last four years of education before i step into total chaos of the outside world. its now or never.
i tell you what i want. i want BALANCE. hrm. and this is actually a tough position to be into. and why is that?because i'm OKAY with anything. i can be stuck in a office forever designing great stuff. i can start a business if i have a partner and be organised with it. i can be lecturer and be happy with youngsters. i can do part time job and live more for my future family. lol. and if i'm just okay with everything, i would not excel in anything. i would not focus and give my best to whatever i'm doing. and again, stuck in the centre, weird, middle range. this is what the 'BALANCE' i want would turn out.
see??see how bad it would be??so i have to push myself from now. bear in mind what would turn out if i don't give my best. and really really FOCUS in what i HAVE to do now. ya. my red colour. improve my red colour!!!my blue is more than enough, maybe i even won't need to work that hard to graduate as an engineer. but my RED. only freaking four years left to work with it. its do or die. i DON'T want to be a nerdy engineer who is stuck in her post and friendless forever. ( choi! btw.) apparently my 'redness' is BELOW the passing rate. aiks. i so don't want this. i wasn't like this. its the freaking bloody nerdy stupid a levels which made me turn out like this in these past two years. i was a leader. i was brave. i was active. i was SOCIAL. long ago. it should be still in me. i just need to awaken it once again. the passion to bond with people, to care, to love and to believe.
RED RED!!GO RED!!
i'm on the highway already. the 'ENGINEERING' highway. i still don't know which exit i would take that i'll be on for the rest of my life. but i know to get til the end, 'RED' is my essential catalyst. it'll craft my way and lead me to a life i can cope with, no matter what the obstacles are. i've known this for a long time already, but only in my brain. today, i've listen to exact words of my greatest failure thrown at my face by other people. its time for the problem to be faced and to be solved. its time to shape myself to a better, stronger, braver, greater person. IN THESE FOUR YEARS.
hmph. i can do it. i must do it. i must change. i must not eat my own words.
chaoz for now. til then.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
life??
okay..life is the best now..freedom, people, relaxation, everything is good. i have a long holiday, before i start university few weeks later, and i'm enjoying every minute of it. mm hmm..i wake and sleep whatever time i want, i can finally follow series and dramas whole day long, i meet my beloved friends, share stories, have actual conversations, how cool is that??compared to the stupid busy study shut out life i have in a levels. you know, a levels is really unhealthy, it gave me a stupid , bad habit. that is to act, or is really being busy when people is around me. as in study, think, listn song or something, so i can AVOID conversations. ya, i actually AVOID conversations with people around me, coz at that time, my life is so lifeless i don't wanna talk anything with people around me. aiks. but whatever, those days are over, and i need to, and have as much free time as possible to connect with people again. yep, people is my priority now. so anyway, that's my near future resolution, put people first before my work. that's how simple it should be. taking baby steps.
but then today, came a sudden call from certain person, make my whole mind thinking again. i know this is the long existed problem i'm having, but because its like a far future problem, i put it off my mind again and again. yep, the call is about my future. as in my REAL 10 years 20 years later future. what do i want to be? an engineer. duh, says certain voice in my head. but of course myself knows that its not about my occupation, but the 'person' that i want to be. haih. yep. what a HUGE question. how is anyone gonna answer that right here right now? and of course i know now is the ideal time to think about it, or else after university starts, i'll be like too busy or too occupied or once again drift along with the 'flow' people is going, and then i'll never 'find' myself..study, graduate, work in a good company to gain experience, maybe climb the corporate ladder, maybe not, accept the 'so-call' reality and lost my chance to live my own life??is it that bad?to follow the 'flow'.. argh.
so. is it not true that people who like physics and maths should choose the engineering field?is it not true that there'll be a big chance i'll love the job of analysing, designing whatsoever tecnical job?and the certain call advised me to open my mind and go through the whole process of 'finding' my 'calling' in this world??hasn't i gone through that already?from the whole lot of choices, i picked off arts, language, business, then bio related fields, then of course at last, left with the rational choice of a moderate, not too expensive, professional , and suite my interests course-ENGINEERING. so now some how i've got it all wrong and maybe i should be in advertising or management or something i don't know??how should i freaking choose this.
argh. of course, i really hoped that certain call would come earlier, not AFTER i just registered an paid for a university. but i KNEW it would be like this, its the second time already, the first is when long ago i almost decided to study QS at UTAR, kedah. argh. but of course, i know its not the call's fault, its my own future, its very kind and sweet to be concerned about it for me, maybe they won't be other person who would do that for me, and maybe it could be a wrong choice for me??i'm really grateful for the call, really, i am. but freaking need to consider the whole sea of options again is stressing me out.
one word. PARADIGM. too bad i'm not brought up to be a person full of dreams and hopes and ambitions and adventures. i'm brought up by a pharmacist and a teacher, so, more or less, i would like to be in my confort zone, a stable life, a stable job, a routine life with some free time i can do happy things with people i care. i don't even have a dream like opening a kindergarden or something. or changing the world, saving lives, saving trees?? what do i want?or need?? of course, the time has changed, i know that. its not the industrial age anymore. its the 'knowledge or something like that' age now. paradigm, the lens of seeing the world. its not something that you can change overnight. its something planted in you regarding how you are brought up. i would like to change. i would like to do what people seems fun. travel, invent something, save humanity, be the saint like person, or the leader of some super huge company, or whatever awesome stuff people do. is it wrong not to have such big dreams?do i really need to change who i am now? do i really need to rack my brain to figure out why i was born?or how to place my mark in this world?is the 'flow' really bad?
i would like to change. i would like to be better, in my own ways. what's the heck with engineering?is it really not suitable for girls?=.= what the hell.
thanks for the questions, the whole lot of them, but no answers. argh.
the future in the long run is a great unknown. how should i plan anything when i don't know what i want in life?or rather i'm okay with everything in life. bring it on! my 'calling' ??what the heck is that?! why can't i leave it to the 'future me' to decide? T.T
i think the problem here is i don't believe much... #$@*##^&@!!
hrm. i should believe.
still thinking. i believe i believe i believe.
chaoz for now~
but then today, came a sudden call from certain person, make my whole mind thinking again. i know this is the long existed problem i'm having, but because its like a far future problem, i put it off my mind again and again. yep, the call is about my future. as in my REAL 10 years 20 years later future. what do i want to be? an engineer. duh, says certain voice in my head. but of course myself knows that its not about my occupation, but the 'person' that i want to be. haih. yep. what a HUGE question. how is anyone gonna answer that right here right now? and of course i know now is the ideal time to think about it, or else after university starts, i'll be like too busy or too occupied or once again drift along with the 'flow' people is going, and then i'll never 'find' myself..study, graduate, work in a good company to gain experience, maybe climb the corporate ladder, maybe not, accept the 'so-call' reality and lost my chance to live my own life??is it that bad?to follow the 'flow'.. argh.
so. is it not true that people who like physics and maths should choose the engineering field?is it not true that there'll be a big chance i'll love the job of analysing, designing whatsoever tecnical job?and the certain call advised me to open my mind and go through the whole process of 'finding' my 'calling' in this world??hasn't i gone through that already?from the whole lot of choices, i picked off arts, language, business, then bio related fields, then of course at last, left with the rational choice of a moderate, not too expensive, professional , and suite my interests course-ENGINEERING. so now some how i've got it all wrong and maybe i should be in advertising or management or something i don't know??how should i freaking choose this.
argh. of course, i really hoped that certain call would come earlier, not AFTER i just registered an paid for a university. but i KNEW it would be like this, its the second time already, the first is when long ago i almost decided to study QS at UTAR, kedah. argh. but of course, i know its not the call's fault, its my own future, its very kind and sweet to be concerned about it for me, maybe they won't be other person who would do that for me, and maybe it could be a wrong choice for me??i'm really grateful for the call, really, i am. but freaking need to consider the whole sea of options again is stressing me out.
one word. PARADIGM. too bad i'm not brought up to be a person full of dreams and hopes and ambitions and adventures. i'm brought up by a pharmacist and a teacher, so, more or less, i would like to be in my confort zone, a stable life, a stable job, a routine life with some free time i can do happy things with people i care. i don't even have a dream like opening a kindergarden or something. or changing the world, saving lives, saving trees?? what do i want?or need?? of course, the time has changed, i know that. its not the industrial age anymore. its the 'knowledge or something like that' age now. paradigm, the lens of seeing the world. its not something that you can change overnight. its something planted in you regarding how you are brought up. i would like to change. i would like to do what people seems fun. travel, invent something, save humanity, be the saint like person, or the leader of some super huge company, or whatever awesome stuff people do. is it wrong not to have such big dreams?do i really need to change who i am now? do i really need to rack my brain to figure out why i was born?or how to place my mark in this world?is the 'flow' really bad?
i would like to change. i would like to be better, in my own ways. what's the heck with engineering?is it really not suitable for girls?=.= what the hell.
thanks for the questions, the whole lot of them, but no answers. argh.
the future in the long run is a great unknown. how should i plan anything when i don't know what i want in life?or rather i'm okay with everything in life. bring it on! my 'calling' ??what the heck is that?! why can't i leave it to the 'future me' to decide? T.T
i think the problem here is i don't believe much... #$@*##^&@!!
hrm. i should believe.
still thinking. i believe i believe i believe.
chaoz for now~
Saturday, June 11, 2011
after a levels...
Days after a levels is the best!!woo hoo~~no more lifelessness and don't have to control myself so much..wahaha..though i have to start limit myself and start doing constructive stuff or i'll end up a pig..its so fun, waking up in the morning having the whole day FREE ahead..haha..and univervity life in near future to look forward to=]
Driving is so fun=] yea..i love MANUAL..though i still need to practise a lot and be very very careful..everyboday's holiday is around the corner!!time to gather and chit chat=DD i've just applied for monash university today..hopefully can get in horh?may have a couple of to-be-classmates already..haha..i used to think i want to have a fresh start..but what's wrong to have old friends?and looking forward to new friends too=] engineering course, should can find many same frequency de people horh?haha..dunno..
okay. just to update a bit..
stay open minded.
chaoz~
Driving is so fun=] yea..i love MANUAL..though i still need to practise a lot and be very very careful..everyboday's holiday is around the corner!!time to gather and chit chat=DD i've just applied for monash university today..hopefully can get in horh?may have a couple of to-be-classmates already..haha..i used to think i want to have a fresh start..but what's wrong to have old friends?and looking forward to new friends too=] engineering course, should can find many same frequency de people horh?haha..dunno..
okay. just to update a bit..
stay open minded.
chaoz~
Thursday, June 2, 2011
bye bye
yep..its time for teary good byes, after one and a half year. i'm finally done with A levels!!!yoohoo!!how cool is that??haha.
sorry. it won't be teary actually, because i'm actually happy leaving a levels. haha. i'm very glad to kiss my books and inti and all the other stuff goodbye. haha. so, here's my farewell speech.
BYE BYE A levels!!you really suck like hell. bye bye inti. u suck quite a bit too. bye bye rapid kl U623, i no longer need to wait for you like forever to fetch me to college. bye bye FURTHER MATHS. self studying is no fun at all, this is my first and last time trying it. bye bye the other 3 bloody subjects which i had to hold on to for this past one and a half year. and also, bye bye lifeless, bye bye no life, bye bye stupid stupid a levels.
haha. how's that?of corse i've some thank yous to make too. thx you friends and pals of any kind to make a levels bearable. i mean, i've survived it, didn't i??thx you Take Away, though now i have to stop drinking dor a while due to my favourite passion fruit juice is likely to contain certain building chemicals..oh well..thx you stact club, making my life in college slightly exciting, though its only for few months. thx you ricola, my phone, green tea, chinese tea, inti level 9 ( also known as ' mouth floor'), taylors' notes and yee min's further maths notes for setting up the study mood for me..haha..it make my study life very very much easier. especially level 9. its my study heaven. haha.
okay, that's all for teary goodbyes. no hard feelings. haha. i've reach another turning point!!hmm..where to go next??=]
til we meet again. chaoz~
sorry. it won't be teary actually, because i'm actually happy leaving a levels. haha. i'm very glad to kiss my books and inti and all the other stuff goodbye. haha. so, here's my farewell speech.
BYE BYE A levels!!you really suck like hell. bye bye inti. u suck quite a bit too. bye bye rapid kl U623, i no longer need to wait for you like forever to fetch me to college. bye bye FURTHER MATHS. self studying is no fun at all, this is my first and last time trying it. bye bye the other 3 bloody subjects which i had to hold on to for this past one and a half year. and also, bye bye lifeless, bye bye no life, bye bye stupid stupid a levels.
haha. how's that?of corse i've some thank yous to make too. thx you friends and pals of any kind to make a levels bearable. i mean, i've survived it, didn't i??thx you Take Away, though now i have to stop drinking dor a while due to my favourite passion fruit juice is likely to contain certain building chemicals..oh well..thx you stact club, making my life in college slightly exciting, though its only for few months. thx you ricola, my phone, green tea, chinese tea, inti level 9 ( also known as ' mouth floor'), taylors' notes and yee min's further maths notes for setting up the study mood for me..haha..it make my study life very very much easier. especially level 9. its my study heaven. haha.
okay, that's all for teary goodbyes. no hard feelings. haha. i've reach another turning point!!hmm..where to go next??=]
til we meet again. chaoz~
Sunday, May 22, 2011
NAHHHHHHH
mmhmm...goin a bit insane here already. that's what happen when your exam drags on and on for an entire month. and mine's not over yet. 3 more freaking papers to go!!!i thought that the next time i blog will be of words of celebration. haih. too bad..i couldn't make it til then. stuck at home days after days after days preparing for the incoming papers is driving me mad. oh my..i don't really have the fighting spirit anymore. just hope its over soon. not rushing to the finishing line. just walking pace after pace after pace at a steady speed. then when it comes, it comes..this is what happens if you prepare early for the exam..good?bad?i think its the same..giving what amount of time to prepare.its the same outcome i'll get..long or short i'll just fit into it and get it ready on time. so it doesn't matters much. so this is what it feels like to have your exams prepared earlier. well. at least won't feel that gan jiong, if sense of lifelessness can compensate for that. oh well.
what a toneless post...lalalalala...oh well...there's exam tommorrow. ha..ha..ha... go...exam.....
chaoz~
what a toneless post...lalalalala...oh well...there's exam tommorrow. ha..ha..ha... go...exam.....
chaoz~
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
crappy mood
mm hmm. this again. c.r.a.p. . otherwise why am i here?? but no longer actually, because i've gotten over it again. haha. stupid right??lol. this is always how it is. crappy mood. then 'blogging' comes across my mind. then before i hit the computer, all complains rush into my mind, and i am like having a imaginary blogging process in my head. then solutions. then taadahh..was over it!! haha. cool right?? but then, the 'getting over it' process won't be completed unless i really have blogged about it, right here. so, here i am.=]
okay. so why again, is this crappy mood??i think its the same for every a levels candidate. i feel like i'm gonna DIE!!and again, not suicidal or anything, that's literally how i feel, quote: 'arghhhhh...i can DIE!!!!' yep. that's what i felt until an hour ago. lol. at this point, a levels in exactly one week away, i'm not crushing to death by the stress or pressure or something, though this does not diminish our suffering by the slightest, i am SUFFOCATING because of the repeating of studying four stup*d subjects over and over and over again and somehow its not finish yet though hours spent pouring over them and cannot stop until this freaking month is finally over. and i cannot call those subjects stup*d because i need to score As in them or something. argh. god. this few months is like hell. i've got NOTHING to do except study. i wake up, study. sick of it , then stop. then thinking what should i do next, and 'study' bore back to my mind again=.= hello??where's the options??and i freaking can't change the routine, coz like i said, a levels is in exactly one week time, and i'm not done studying them, though i don't know how is this even possible, seeing i've spent almost every waking hours dwelling over them. arghhh..
so. of course. here comes the plan for near future, which i'll have every single time exam is near. yep. the after-exam-pretty-pretty-freedom-plan. ha.ha.ha. i'm near insanity now. anyways, i'm so busy for this year, i rarely do any spending. so after exam i'm gonna have my own shopping spree!!i'm gonna do the shopping myself seeing i can't rely on my sis on them anymore. she's too busy with work and she doesn't buy college clothing anymore. oh well. time to learn. aiks. and, seeing my dad is finally getting a dslr, canon 550 D, i'm gonna have a new toy!!wahaha..nice nice photos.teehee. AND. i'm thinking of an investment, an 'ipod touch' investment. i think i can afford one. but not sure if its worth it onot. seeing i'm not a very cyber active person.that plan is still in pending mode. and of course. though i have run away from the problem for 15 months, its gonna be time for me to actually sit behind a steering wheel, working on those clutches and pedals, using a MANUAL gear, and actually start with driving again. *gulp*. terrifying. exam ends on 2nd june. and if its decided, i'll start uni on 25th july, at monash, e&e engineering course. so one a a half month in between, for me to finish with all these plans.
anyways, i'm gonna give up on animes and manga. they're so disappointing. after finishing fullmetal alchemist brotherhood ( best best ever!!), death note and conan, i can't find anything else worth reading. kekkaishi was okay, code geass is cool, bleach, erhhh..any how, others seem like crap. so i'm gonna stop looking for a while.maybe i'll switch to english comedies. 'How I Met your Mother' is sooo nice especially after a crappy day. comedy is nice. and learning some english is nice too. i prefer a few laughs these days than following mediocre mangas. and maybe i'll try discovery channels. haha. oh well.
one last thing. blogging is so magical. haha. 'imaginary blogging' in my mind is so magical. its like i finally laid out all the pieces in a line, finally getting all the puzzles in order, by putting all my thoughts in black and white words. its just solves all the confusion in my mind, clear out the crappiness. simply. magical. haha. that's why i won't mind missing out a few hours of studying by doing this.
hmmm...do you feel it??the calming and sweetness of an imaginary breeze...freedom is near=]
chaoz~
okay. so why again, is this crappy mood??i think its the same for every a levels candidate. i feel like i'm gonna DIE!!and again, not suicidal or anything, that's literally how i feel, quote: 'arghhhhh...i can DIE!!!!' yep. that's what i felt until an hour ago. lol. at this point, a levels in exactly one week away, i'm not crushing to death by the stress or pressure or something, though this does not diminish our suffering by the slightest, i am SUFFOCATING because of the repeating of studying four stup*d subjects over and over and over again and somehow its not finish yet though hours spent pouring over them and cannot stop until this freaking month is finally over. and i cannot call those subjects stup*d because i need to score As in them or something. argh. god. this few months is like hell. i've got NOTHING to do except study. i wake up, study. sick of it , then stop. then thinking what should i do next, and 'study' bore back to my mind again=.= hello??where's the options??and i freaking can't change the routine, coz like i said, a levels is in exactly one week time, and i'm not done studying them, though i don't know how is this even possible, seeing i've spent almost every waking hours dwelling over them. arghhh..
so. of course. here comes the plan for near future, which i'll have every single time exam is near. yep. the after-exam-pretty-pretty-freedom-plan. ha.ha.ha. i'm near insanity now. anyways, i'm so busy for this year, i rarely do any spending. so after exam i'm gonna have my own shopping spree!!i'm gonna do the shopping myself seeing i can't rely on my sis on them anymore. she's too busy with work and she doesn't buy college clothing anymore. oh well. time to learn. aiks. and, seeing my dad is finally getting a dslr, canon 550 D, i'm gonna have a new toy!!wahaha..nice nice photos.teehee. AND. i'm thinking of an investment, an 'ipod touch' investment. i think i can afford one. but not sure if its worth it onot. seeing i'm not a very cyber active person.that plan is still in pending mode. and of course. though i have run away from the problem for 15 months, its gonna be time for me to actually sit behind a steering wheel, working on those clutches and pedals, using a MANUAL gear, and actually start with driving again. *gulp*. terrifying. exam ends on 2nd june. and if its decided, i'll start uni on 25th july, at monash, e&e engineering course. so one a a half month in between, for me to finish with all these plans.
anyways, i'm gonna give up on animes and manga. they're so disappointing. after finishing fullmetal alchemist brotherhood ( best best ever!!), death note and conan, i can't find anything else worth reading. kekkaishi was okay, code geass is cool, bleach, erhhh..any how, others seem like crap. so i'm gonna stop looking for a while.maybe i'll switch to english comedies. 'How I Met your Mother' is sooo nice especially after a crappy day. comedy is nice. and learning some english is nice too. i prefer a few laughs these days than following mediocre mangas. and maybe i'll try discovery channels. haha. oh well.
one last thing. blogging is so magical. haha. 'imaginary blogging' in my mind is so magical. its like i finally laid out all the pieces in a line, finally getting all the puzzles in order, by putting all my thoughts in black and white words. its just solves all the confusion in my mind, clear out the crappiness. simply. magical. haha. that's why i won't mind missing out a few hours of studying by doing this.
hmmm...do you feel it??the calming and sweetness of an imaginary breeze...freedom is near=]
chaoz~
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)