do what I must

hey there. this post is a gentle reminder to myself. sigh, feeling so restless lately. is it because that I'm 21? I couldn't seem to chill and slack in peace. Ain't like the past summer breaks, I feel so guilty each time I nap or watch tv or read the same old story books to pass time. I feel so guilty and restless.

Always, there's a tiny voice in my head. I NEED to clean my study table. I NEED to organize my wardrobe. I NEED to get started if I want to make those handcrafts again. I NEED to learn to cook. I NEED to read all the untouched new books. I NEED to read up for my internship. I NEED to exercise. I NEED to plan the outings and get out of the house to socialize. I NEED to buy of the stuff which I have to buy.

and the tiny voices just gets louder and louder. guess it's a good thing I have signed up for internship. need something to force myself to get those brains exercised. hmph. and guess what, zero outing since my exams ended. eeeeeeee. no one wants to see me. T.T 

aaand. i'll take this as a new journey. a three months journey. let's forget study life for a while. also ELP finale is near. I'm a little excited, just a little bit. 

and there's this song we sing at the elp: let it be. three simple words which ask for so much. it bugs my mind so much I still failed to let it be. if there's a deadline for me to get over it, it is right NOW. two years is already too much of a waste of time, an additional half a year is ridiculously pointless and utter idiocy. shouldn't even waste an extra a single second brooding on it.

it's a new journey. a brand new journey. new motto: before starting on something, first think how you would finish it.

some what, feeling a little stressed out. sigh.

life ain't easy huh

breakaway from monash

hello all. the three months holidays have begun!! yes. I'm done with my finals, not practically happy with my com sys paper, but the rest are okay I guess. Anyway, time to sum up for this semester!!

This semester is a tough one. basically, Since the start of the semester, about ninety of the time is spent on studies. like, seriously, I can't even have a longer lunch break even if I want. every day, there will just be counting the remaining hours we get to meet the next deadline, and the next, and the next. Building a robot is all the more the most nerve racking project we ever had. Imagine sacrificing all the other unit studies just to spend more time on building robot. everyday, we stayed in the lab for long hours to solve endless problems of the robot. from material, positioning angle, programming, and circuits, nothing in which we could take for granted of.

So, there goes the 12 weeks. Plus the finals. All done after sleepless nights and stressful days. Nothing much to add on to the story at all. what a boring story of an engineering student life. sigh. so the third year, what's the difference u'd ask? simple answer: minus the play time, sleep time and outing time, then add all those into study and nerd time. 

Stupid semester. I've basically turned into to fat black lazy antisocial nerd already. aaaaaa. people have been telling me I've grown FAT. I IS FAAAATer than before. ish. gonna hit the gym these holidays. or pool. ishhhhh. and really I don't feel like talking most of the time. i don't know why. I just don't feel cheerful, at all. I'm constantly tired and stressed out. where got mood to mix around I ask you? even elp activities sound like a bother. 

the only consolating part is that I've met two very nice people in my group of electrical friends. not that I don't know them before. just that being in the same group has really brought us closer. hahaha. it's a weird group though. the three of us are soooo different. but they helped me survive the semester. one provide me transport to uni the other helped me source the past years. heh. so grateful I am ^^ wouldn't have gone so far without them! tq Pz and yin wei ^^

So, one semester it is, since the old group has gathered together. such a long time isn't it? what'll it be like three months from now I wonder.

anyways, these holidays, the main agenda would be internship. no more slacking, resting, playing. working to add value to my future career instead. also, I've officially stopped giving tuitions. that means no  incomeeee!!! damn. but, guess it is time for me to stop anyway. my sister is graduating and I've going into my final year soon enough. I really have to focus in my studies.

so ya. and I'm stuck at home for two days since exam ended. and I just spammed all the group chats at whatsapp to schedule outings. heh. hopefully, in these three coming months, I could find back my cheerful side. and yeshhh no monash for three months!! gosh I hate that place. hmph.