crappy mood

mm hmm. this again. c.r.a.p. . otherwise why am i here?? but no longer actually, because i've gotten over it again. haha. stupid right??lol. this is always how it is. crappy mood. then 'blogging' comes across my mind. then before i hit the computer, all complains rush into my mind, and i am like having a imaginary blogging process in my head. then solutions. then taadahh..was over it!! haha. cool right?? but then, the 'getting over it' process won't be completed unless i really have blogged about it, right here. so, here i am.=]

okay. so why again, is this crappy mood??i think its the same for every a levels candidate. i feel like i'm gonna DIE!!and again, not suicidal or anything, that's literally how i feel, quote: 'arghhhhh...i can DIE!!!!' yep. that's what i felt until an hour ago. lol. at this point, a levels in exactly one week away, i'm not crushing to death by the stress or pressure or something, though this does not diminish our suffering by the slightest, i am SUFFOCATING because of the repeating of studying four stup*d subjects over and over and over again and somehow its not finish yet though hours spent pouring over them and cannot stop until this freaking month is finally over. and i cannot call those subjects stup*d because i need to score As in them or something. argh. god. this few months is like hell. i've got NOTHING to do except study. i wake up, study. sick of it , then stop. then thinking what should i do next, and 'study' bore back to my mind again=.= hello??where's the options??and i freaking can't change the routine, coz like i said, a levels is in exactly one week time, and i'm not done studying them, though i don't know how is this even possible, seeing i've spent almost every waking hours dwelling over them. arghhh..

so. of course. here comes the plan for near future, which i'll have every single time exam is near. yep. the after-exam-pretty-pretty-freedom-plan. ha.ha.ha. i'm near insanity now. anyways, i'm so busy for this year, i rarely do any spending. so after exam i'm gonna have my own shopping spree!!i'm gonna do the shopping myself seeing i can't rely on my sis on them anymore. she's too busy with work and she doesn't buy college clothing anymore. oh well. time to learn. aiks. and, seeing my dad is finally getting a dslr, canon 550 D, i'm gonna have a new toy!!wahaha..nice nice photos.teehee. AND. i'm thinking of an investment, an 'ipod touch' investment. i think i can afford one. but not sure if its worth it onot. seeing i'm not a very cyber active person.that plan is still in pending mode. and of course. though i have run away from the problem for 15 months, its gonna be time for me to actually sit behind a steering wheel, working on those clutches and pedals, using a MANUAL gear, and actually start with driving again. *gulp*. terrifying. exam ends on 2nd june. and if its decided, i'll start uni on 25th july, at monash, e&e engineering course. so one a a half month in between, for me to finish with all these plans.

anyways, i'm gonna give up on animes and manga. they're so disappointing. after finishing fullmetal alchemist brotherhood ( best best ever!!), death note and conan, i can't find anything else worth reading. kekkaishi was okay, code geass is cool, bleach, erhhh..any how, others seem like crap. so i'm gonna stop looking for a while.maybe i'll switch to english comedies. 'How I Met your Mother' is sooo nice especially after a crappy day. comedy is nice. and learning some english is nice too. i prefer a few laughs these days than following mediocre mangas. and maybe i'll try discovery channels. haha. oh well.

one last thing. blogging is so magical. haha. 'imaginary blogging' in my mind is so magical. its like i finally laid out all the pieces in a line, finally getting all the puzzles in order, by putting all my thoughts in black and white words. its just solves all the confusion in my mind, clear out the crappiness. simply. magical. haha. that's why i won't mind missing out a few hours of studying by doing this.

hmmm...do you feel it??the calming and sweetness of an imaginary breeze...freedom is near=]


chaoz~