My Flaws and Selina

Yes, end of Week 11 and my mind still find time in between all the crazy workloads to reflect about life. And yesterday, I watched the interview of Selina about her recovery journey from the bad burnt in the fire accident. Yes, Selina from S.H.E. Ya, she's awesome, she's courageous, she's definitely Ms. Positive Energy. Yes she's an inspiration, a role model to all the females. Yes I was deeply touched by her story.

And, yet, I'm still stuck at where I am today. I would also want Future Me to thank me for not giving up on life. Amid all the mundane but super stressful workload and quarter life crisis, I must still accept that such is life, and a its a good happy life. I must believe in that. And work my ass off towards that -> a good and happy life.

And, the people. I'm a human, yet i fear human. In age of 23, I can already say that this is the biggest obstacle in my life. Humans. Talking. Emotional attachment. Responsibility. Originality. Judgement. Norm. Respect. Attitude. You see, some of them are just the right opposite of the others. Its impossible to be all of them just so to fit into all the places in the world. While wanting to do everything right, I lost my voice. I shut down. I closed up. And I got stuck, instead of getting to all the places in the world, I ended up not belonging anywhere.

Again, sometimes its just like taking  a leap of faith. I'm not the outgoing friendly outspoken cheerful people's favourite. But, I can be more attentive, kinder, more open minded and more respectful towards others. I can't form pretty dazzling words, but i can form constructive positive words. If I don't like the negative attitude people have towards me, I can forget about it and not let it get to me. Forget about what I cannot, and focus on what I can.

I can live a better and happier life, just because I can.

And. I have a final year report to complete within 4 days. This, I believe I also can.

And. sorry for the incoherent writing. I realized there is not much flow. I can't really think straight. Literally.