freaking engineering!!!!

TADAHHHH. it's mid sem break. means I have time to blog =D and this's the post title because it sounds like some curse, so. lol. 

recently, life is hectic like HELL. like, seriously. I even fell sick because of it =( engineering course, no joke man. 24 credit hours a week, and that excludes self-studying time. this sem, self-studying is like, you do or die. especially computing, MATlab. omg, why shoooooo hard? seriously I damn noob in this. damn noob. almost everyday, I stayed back at uni because of MATlab. that alone has taken up so much of my time. argh. and majoring in electrical, I have to stick with it and be pro at it. goshhhh. why is it so hard? 

and omg damn a lot of smart people in engineering make me damn stress only arrrr. they all damn pro in so many extra stuff, it's like where do u even learn that kinda stuff?they do codings and formulas to generate answers for our project, like, out of thin air. damn pro k? thx god there's one of the genius in my group. all I know is to take out calculator and hit the buttons one by one@@ and the way they document stuff and jot notes down, in EVERY lecture and EVERY assignment. so detailed. AND their speed in doing them. it's like, are u even human??so persistent, so hardcore. imagine living in the same circle with those people. PEER pressure, that's what I call it. lol.
 

and things are getting, how do I put it, a bit complicated. oops. conflict here and there. engineering requires lots of group work, there's gangs and cliques forming everywhere, plus there's still this too-many-guys-hence-bo-balance thing, some of the things are getting on to my nerves. hmmm. need to control. my temper.  

and I know I damn nerd this sem. damn! I don't want that. but, still no outside activities for me to engage in. hrm. I'm also spending too much time with people within the engineering circle. everyday assignment this, calculation that, matlab this, coding that. that makes things bo balanced too. damn. 

on the other hand, how is even possible, I still feel I'm behind schedule. argh. HOW MUCH TIME HAVE I SPENT ON STUDYING? almost all the time, I'd say. eeeee. why I still no pro? T.T 

aaaaaand, thx god I still don't hate electrical and MATlab. thx god. 

dear MATlab, pls don't scare me too much?I damn scared T.T 

mid sem break, I shoooooo need this break. I need to BREATHE. I need to get out of monash T.T i need a break from going to uni from EARLY morning til LATE evening EVERY SINGLE DAY then jam for ONE HOUR home and still repeating the same routine EVERY week. 

lol. 

my life now. stress much? duh. 

I still enjoy it though. I must be insane. lol. 

til then. 

chaoz~